j dot trammell

i like it. :) goodnight..

it's astonishing to me how little weight we put behind honoring our promises. what's worse is that it seems like the more insignificant the commitment, the less convicted we feel about breaking it..

going to a wedding? "oh we can't miss that, we promised."
working for someone else? "I mean, it's totally understandable. i just bought a new car and i have to show my mom!"

when you think about it, doesn't the value of the situation determine the value of our word when we decide either to keep it or to break it? for instance, if i steal a $25,000 car, at least i traded my honor for a.. well, a $25,000 car. on the other hand, if i steal a 5 cent pencil.. what does that say about the value of my integrity? I just gave it away for 5 cents.

I know this is a little disjointed, but I'm still trying to grasp this concept. please bear with me..

yet another start I've never seen before, yesterday revealed itself at the faint sound of beauty and the cold comfortability of a house that has never been mine.

I quickly realize the gravity of the situation when it forces me to the floor. I've often wondered what life would be if we never had to get up at all; if we were able to hide from the dormant world outside the force field of 200 count bedsheets tucked neatly between the mattress and it's spring. and if I was awake, lying face up, alone and useless, I would no doubt regress from utility toward safety, thus toward death. and though we, even now in this reality of business, creep at death with every ounce of life we possess, this lack of purpose would hurl us at the speed of............................................................................................................................................................

see, I like to rush things;

the car in front of me, the lady (oh look, here come the feminists to picket my blog..) at the drive thru window, the microwave that holds captive my undercooked tilapia filet, everything.. of course, this does not stop short of the hand of God. I forget sometimes that He holds time in his hands, and I try to contain it's squirmy.. bleh.. in mine. up to this point, God has been merciful and has not allowed me to be crushed by it's mass, but I'm convinced that soon enough, if I don't learn to let time tick to the rhythm of God's heartbeat instead of forcing it to tick to the irregular beat of mine, my world will end with (and at) the speed of time. again, in His mercy, He has given me someone that pulls almost everywhere I push.

He has given us the miracle of balance.

so.. as they say in Geekville, my blog is officially 'live'. (and for those of you who don't know what that means, you should be more excited about your life than the rest of us.)

this has been a long journey for my team and me, so i'd like to take a moment and send out some thank-you's, or 'shout-outs' for those in or near the inner-city (no Chesterfield Valley, that does not include you.).

first, let me give it up for my main man, the G-ster, the one, the only, God.
next, i can't forget about all those little people that have helped me make it this far.
also, let me not neglect the impact of those who have come before me; people who are far more deserving of this honor; individuals such as Mother Theresa, Princess Diana, Teddy Roosevelt, and Tupac. these forerunners have opened the door for minorities such as myself to emerge. into the forefront of society. but, i digress.
lastly, i would like to thank my readers, both current(as in you, right now) and future(as in your neighbor, later, like tomorrow and such)

this concludes my first posting.